Chapter 941: A Massive Scam!
"There's no need for you to even bring it up. I'll gladly do them," replied Dong Qitian. "Best if you brief me about those ten tasks — I need to know about them beforehand."
Yun Yang's smile widened and he replied, "Actually, I don't actually have many important tasks at hand for the moment. They're mostly menial ones."
"Pardon?"
"The first most pressing issue is none other than the fact that everybody's strength in this sect is at remarkably ordinary levels..." Yun Yang started, a little embarrassed. "The sect needs a chief instructor..."
"A chief instructor?" Dong Qitian's brows furrowed instantly. "We've already agreed — I will not hold a post in your sect. What's with all this talk about being a chief instructor?"
Dong Qitian had a nagging feeling that he had been tricked.
Yun Yang smiled apologetically. "Did I say I'd like you to hold a post in my humble little place? Actually, being a chief instructor is just a name. On normal days, you don't even have to do much. You'd only have to monitor the progress of the member's cultivation bases and clarify some questions occasionally... When there's no need to monitor them, we can all sit down at one corner to sip some tea, have a chat, play chess; even picking up girls is on the menu..."
Dong Qitian sensed that something did not seem right the more he listened. His face darkened as he continued to ask, "I'd like to confirm something — how frequently am I not needed to monitor them?"
Yun Yang blinked. "It should be pretty fast. The period of time where you shall assume your role as a chief instructor should take up half a year's time, and if there are certain things that require your attention within this time frame, it'll be considered as part of the ten tasks, depending on circumstances..."
Dong Qitian's face darkened as he retorted, "You don't say? Additional work will be counted as well, of course. What do you mean by...' it'll be considered as part of the ten tasks depending on circumstances'? What circumstances?"
A hint of guilt crept up into Yun Yang's heart suddenly. "Of course. Yes, of course. A slip of the tongue. That was just a slip of the tongue. My mistake."
Dong Qitian gave him a suspicious glance. "You still haven't answered my question. In half a year's time, how many days will there be no need for me to monitor them? I'm highly suspicious regarding your personal character now — please don't lower the good impression I have about you."
Yun Yang wiped some sweat away from his forehead and chuckled nervously. "About that... Pretty frequently, I'd say. They'll be at least a day in every month... or half a day."
"You good-for-nothing!"
Dong Qitian had completely lost his composure.
"How's that any different from prostituting myself to you with that sort of arrangement? One task will take up half a year of my time. Instead of that, I might as well just agree to be your Protector for three years. Won't I get to have more idle time as a Protector instead?"
Yun Yang chuckled nervously. "Elder, if you're willing to take on the role as a Protector, we can amend the terms immediately. Everything will be done according to your wishes, elder. We shall do whatever you say of course. Perhaps... we should take an oath to the heavens and amend it to Protector for three years instead?"
Yun Yang probed cautiously with a face full of hope.
Dong Qitian let out a strange chuckle, as he stole a sideways glance at Yun Yang and rolled his eyes. "Seeing that you're full of tricks, I'm sure you have many more up your sleeves! Do you think that I, Dong Qitian, will fall for your schemes? Do you know what's the most effective way to deal with an intelligent person?"
Yun Yang replied to him almost instinctively. "What is it?"
Dong Qitian guffawed. "It's to go against whatever you wish for and not dance to the tune you desire. You might be able to come up with a million schemes, but I'll have a set of rules I abide by. What are you going to do about it?"
Yun Yang acted as if he felt horribly maligned. "Now, where did that come from, elder? I bore no such intentions at all! Oh, right — do you still have a very good impression of me, elder?
Dong Qitian scoffed. "As of now, my good impression on you has amounted to zero. It's nonexistent!"
Yun Yang's good-looking face darkened. "What? It's already zero? Then what were you saying about lowering your good impression of me!"
Dong Qitian felt his face tightening. He stretched out an arm and pointed towards the side of the road. "Yun Yang, you little brat — do you see that wild boar over there?"
Yun Yang was utterly confused. "I see it."
Dong Qitian snorted. "That's my impression about you... I would trust you only if that wild boar flies!"
Yun Yang felt speechlessly dismayed.
However, at the very next moment, Dong Qitian gasped in shock — perhaps his wrath-ridden finger had activated some sort of threat that packed a punch, for right after the moment he pointed, the poor wild boar suddenly went flying into the air.
It was flying rather swiftly. It's heavy body riled up a tuft of black fog in midair as it's awkward legs wriggled incessantly as if it was rowing. With its tail between its legs, it wriggled in fright, flying further and further and speeding off into the distance rapidly like an escaped prisoner...
"What the f*ck!"
Dong Qitian was tongue-tied as he continued to stare, his eyeballs almost falling out of their sockets. "How the hell can such a thing even happen? That bloody thing is a demonic creature! What the actual f*ck in the name of its holy grandmother..."
Yun Yang almost laughed. "I knew that you've had an erroneous judgment in me, elder. I've always been honest, upright, chivalrous and I possess a heart of gold. This exact thing has just vouched that my words are completely worth placing your faith in, to the point where even the heavens would help me out — this is really evidence that the heavens had been watching us!"
Dong Qitian continued to stare in shock for a bit, then finally dipped his head in dismay. "Sh*t, I've really been had."
Yun Yang burst out into laughter. "Elder, don't worry. How can I, Yun Yang, be a person who expects you to return the favor after helping you? Just trust me and have wholehearted faith in me and you'll never be wrong. No matter who I'd like to scam, it definitely won't be you!"
Dong Qitian laughed querulously for a bit and lapsed into silence.
You won't scam me?
Even my own conscience hurts when you say that.
"What are you laughing about? Don't look down on my newly-established sect. My majordomo has been seeking out talented individuals all these time, and you can feel free to select a few disciples from there as you please, elder... That's called the transfer of knowledge. In that case, a tradition of passing down overall knowledge shall be established in this realm. Isn't it a wonderful thing?
Dong Qitian had initially planned to stop talking to this slick fellow, but when he heard this shameless opinion of his, which was getting more and more outrageous by the second, he could no longer suppress the rage in his heart. He pursed his lips and said, "I guess with that, there's simply no way for me to escape from being the Protector or an Elder of your Residence of Nine Supremes, and if not for that, I'd only have the option of dedicating myself to worshipping your sect, correct?"
"I don't even have to wishfully assume that it's going to take just three years — my entire life has already been sold to you, has it not?"
He stretched out a finger and pressed it directly against Yun Yang's forehead, causing Yun Yang to stagger momentarily. "Your intentions are thoroughly wicked, brat! An ordinary person only has one intestinal tract, but you have nine-hundred of them. Every single one of them twist and meander in an incredibly long-winded manner — the perfect ingredients to make a dish of nine-twist intestines..." (TL Note: Nine-twist intestines (九转大肠) is a traditional Chinese dish made out of pork intestines)
He rolled his eyes in resentment. "What about the other tasks?"
"As for the others, there's nothing much to it. At most, we might be troubled by a few experts sent by sects that own Celestial Luck Banners due to our new status. Just in case we are unable to face them on our own..."
Yun Yang chuckled apologetically. "With your unparalleled strength, elder, I'm sure you'll be able to dismiss them using the amount of time from your break when you're monitoring the other disciples..."
Dong Qitian was expressionless. "It seems that besides being a Protector and an instructor, I'm also a hired thug..."
"Don't make it sound that bad!" Yun Yang cried. "With your participation in the Residence of Nine Supremes, elder, it is equivalent to having the Compliant Golden-Hooped Rod. You're as valuable as a golden bridge that stands tall amidst the seas and a white jade pillar that props itself towards the skies. Your presence shall send tremors into the fray of the Bound of Universe!" (TL Note: Compliant Golden-Hooped Rod (定海神针铁) is a powerful and versatile weapon used by the Monkey King in Journey to the West).
"Alright, alright, I believe you..." Dong Qitian snorted from his nostrils. "... I believe that your words do not stem from a genuine heart."
"These words are really true!"
Dong Qitian snorted and bragged proudly, "With my presence, who would dare to look you directly in the eye? Not even the Sacred Heart Palace would dare to do so... hmph!"