Chapter 526.6: Slapstick Side Story 6 Merchants

Translator: Nat

-Aegir POV-

「Hic......hic......the soybean......I'm terribly sorry......sniff......」

「There, there. You poor thing.」

I pat the crying Celia as she stares at the red letters on her paper and apologizes.

「I don't know anything about margin trading, but it seems more intense than gambling, huh.」

Celia's investment failed splendidly.

The mechanism is still confusing to me, but apparently the amount she committed went about approximately 20 times in the red.

Obviously, Celia's savings cannot cover that amount and she had to rely on me, that's why she's crying.

When I entered the room after hearing Celia's sorrowful voice and saw her lying unconscious on her back, I was scared.

I'm relieved that she was only worried about money.

「Aegir-sama's......sniff, I wanted to be of use......and instead......I put you in debt...... waaah......」

「Well, it sounded like a scam to begin with.」

Celia did business with a mysterious merchant company I never heard of, but when I followed the partnership and consignment information, I came across the C & L company, in other words Claire and Laurie's company.

「It seems there are some people scams don't work on.」

「Umu, I can see through most forms of deception.」

I glance at the sac sitting on the desk that, even after subtracting the amount I lent to Head-helmina for the auction plus interest, contains more than enough gold coins to completely stuff my pockets.

「It's foolish for a head like me to hold onto this money. I think you should keep it.」

She says, grabbing a book in her mouth and rolling over to the windowsill.

Reading and bathing in the sun has become one of her favorite things to do lately. She sometimes also requests for tea.

Celia cries again when she chases my line of sight.

「Now then, let's go.」

I stand up.

We're going to Claire's place.

Adolph told me not to meet her, but it only makes sense that I have to go and discuss the matter regarding the gold Celia borrowed.

「Uuu......I'm prepared to be sold anywhere.」

「Don't be stupid. All the gold in the nation isn't enough for me to sell you.」

I shower her tear-stained face with kisses.

「Knowing that development is an act fires me up though. Let's do that tonight.」

「Right. I will get the rope and handcuffs ready.」

I'm feeling motivated all of a sudden.

C & L Company.

「It has been a while, Margrave Hardlett-sama.」

Celia and I sit side by side on the sofa across from Claire and Laurie.

They initially offered to sit on the floor to be polite, but I don't like acting high and mighty, plus it's hard to talk like that, so I asked them to sit on the sofa.

「It doesn't feel that way.」

「It's been so long since we could talk without Adolph-sama. He is a very capable individual but...... conversations become quite tumultuous when he is present. In this regard, I find talking with the Margrave really fun.」

Celia keeps me in check when I unconsciously ogle her.

Dangerous, dangerous.

「I want to talk about cancelling Celia's debt. If you ask me, this transaction is so nasty that it makes a gambling den pale in comparison. Don't you think it's cruel to force an amateur to shoulder that burden?」

I say to Claire as I pet Celia's head. There are actually multiple merchants crying in front of the company, I wonder if they are also victims of the futures or whatever. I don't think Celia simply messed up though.

「There are no holes in the agreement explained in advance.」

「Agreement......agreement......this? The words are too small for me to read them. It's not fair to assume that the terms were explained with that.」

I can't afford to lose this argument for the sake of the trembling Celia.

Of course, it would go against my honor to command Claire to do as I say because I'm the feudal lord after all she's done for me.

That's why I have to defeat her in this debate and convince her.

It's a battle of words. I have to throw persuasive sentences at Claire and cause her to surrender.

I lift Celia and rest her on my lap.

「Look how cute she is. Don't you feel sorry for making her suffer such a huge loss? I can understand if you didn't for an ugly old man.」

How was that for persuasion?

「She's cute and a fine lady.」

Celia blushes and proudly sticks out her chest as if she never doubted the statement.

「If you're a fully-fledged adult, you can't get by pretending not to know. A thorough explanation was provided before the transaction. In particular, she insisted vehemently that the terms regarding the margin trading were too long-winded and that she understood.」

Aaah, Celia dried up.

For Claire not to be moved by Celia's cuteness, I should say it is as expected of a master merchant.

Claire proceeds to softly place a hand on top of mine.

「To invalidate a debt......you are basically telling me to throw away money.」

She rubs my hand.

「Money to a merchant, you see, is like honor to a knight, a field to a farmer, and the body to a prostitute.」

She places her hand on my chest.

「Hardlett-sama, are you robbing a prostitute of her body? Are you burning her lovely breasts, harming her plump ass......and ravaging her precious place?」

「Don't be ridiculous. I wouldn't do something so horrible!」

Tears well in Claire's eyes.

「Then will you rob me of my money, of my profit?」

「Of course not. I won't!」

Hm? Something feels off.

「Then I will extend the repayment date so please pay me back. Please do the same with your own huge debt too.」

After a fierce verbal dispute, I lost the argument.

I guess I'll hug Celia and we can lick our wounds together.

「Shall we leave the preamble there and move onto the main issue?」

Claire clears her throat and moves next to me.

Celia tries to block her, but wilts when a promissory note gets stuck to her forehead.

「Do you have something that you are hiding?」

「Mmm. Because of my position, I have a lot to hide.」

I say calmly as I turn to the opposite side.

Laurie promptly sits herself on that side.

She is really small now that I look at her again. Even though she is at an adult's age, she seems to have stopped growing, and combined with her height of 145 cm and childish face, I can only see her as a young girl in her teens.

「A party of traders sent to Aless that doesn't involve us......with a small load yet heavy enough to require the strengthening of the carriage and worth a mountain of Aless gold. What are you selling?」

「Hahaha, Adolph would get angry again if I told you so simply. Besides, I also have to conduct my own trade in order to pay back the debt, it's nothing special really.」

I stare up at the ceiling as I answer with a composed expression and tone.

「You even arranged for ships on the river. Are you planning to export to the Federation and the Empire?」

Claire hovers over me and shields my view of the ceiling.

I lower my gaze to the floor.

「If it's such a promising product, why isn't it being sold in Goldonia?」

Laurie crawls in between my legs and looks up at me.

Come on, I don't have anywhere to avert my eyes.

At this point, my only option is to get naked and try to deceive them, but Claire smiles when I put a hand on my clothes.

「Of course, I'm not saying for the Margrave to tell me his secrets. It's just......」

Laurie peers into my eyes.

「If you tell us, we can do it better. We can do it on a larger scale, more efficiently and without anyone finding out.」

I can't say yes.

They have a pretty good hunch about the dwarf gold mine but there's a big difference between me admitting it and not admitting it.

It's like cheating. If I admit it, I lose.

「Laurie, are you ready?」

「Yes, Claire-sama.」

The two of them quickly present me with a sheet of paper.

「What's this?」

It looks like a document about the profits of the C & L company.

When I pass it off to the dried up Celia, she swells back up.

「This......the profit and tax doesn't match! I-it's tax evasion! It's proof of evading tax to the kingdom!」

Claire and Laurie look at me with a grin.

「If this reaches His Majesty, we will be hanged within the day.」

That goes without saying. Even I can't save them if they swindled tax from the kingdom.

「We can't leave this dangerous thing around. Celia, eat it.」

「Yessir! Aaaahgh......」

Claire and Laurie approach with determined faces.

「They have us by the scruff of our necks.」

I understand what they want to say.

This is a sharing of secrets. If I tell them about the truth of the secret trade, Claire won't tell anybody. If they do, I can expose the information about the tax evasion and they'll be finished. I have no intention of joining them in ruin so the document is essentially collateral incentivizing us to protect each other's secret.

Unable to swallow the paper, Celia spits it back out, throws it in the fireplace and stirs the flames with the metal tongs.

「If you're willing to go that far, it can't be helped.」

I steel myself and then spread my arms in resignation.

In the end, I told them everything.

My head hurts from having to think of an excuse to Adolph.

「Do not worry. We are destined to be together.」

My only salvation is Claire's kind smile. Her eyes are sparkling though.

「Well, it's not like I can take back what I've said. That being the case, I hope you take care of me.」

I deliberately slump my shoulders and get up from my seat.

「Ara, going home already? I prepared a feast in celebration of reaching an agreement.」

Doors to the adjacent room are swung open.

Sweet scents waft from the unnaturally dim room which contains a large red bed and a pile of wet towels by the bedside......no explanation should be needed for such a scene.

「Was a celebration unnecessary, Aegir-sama?」

I silently pull Claire into my arms.

「I knew this was going to happen no what!」

Celia pounces on my back while Laurie stealthily reaches her hand around my waist.

Claire lays down on the bed and I tear her clothes off.

I suck lightly on her shapely breasts as they spill out and then briefly stand up to take my own clothes off.

「I will do it!」

Celia skillfully guides my body out of my clothes with her hands.

The moment she drops my underwear, my penis whips up and slaps my stomach.

Despite having the naked Claire before my eyes, I didn't expect it to be this hard before foreplay.

「It's the aphrodisiac incense.」

「A mushroom that only grows in the jungle area known as Hatsujoudake was dehydrated and then burned. Although less potent than potions created with ingredients like mandragora, it has a more pleasant fragrance as well as the arousal effect. It of course......applies to women as well.」

Claire's face is red and her breathing is heavy.

Upon closer inspection, Laurie and Celia are also staring at my dick with feverish eyes.

They are not in an abnormal state of arousal that eliminates all thoughts in their head other than sex like the state caused by alraune pollen.

The state is similar to one where they have been continuously teased or forced to abstain from sexual activity for days.

「Since we're here, I at least have to be first.」

Celia says as she circles to the front of me and plants a kiss on my dick from the bottom.

She sucks the middle of the shaft, brings my dick down from my stomach and kisses the tip.

「Fufufu, now I'll be the first of the day.」

Celia, whose reasoning is a bit suspect due to the incense, puffs her chest out with satisfaction.

But that kiss was effective.

Extra veins pop out from my dick and a translucent liquid drips from the tip as the entire organ twitches irregularly.

I silently lay on top of Claire.

「......Nn.」

Claire grabs my dick and guides it to the entrance of her slit.

All I have to do is to thrust my hips.

Before I can do so, we exchange a passionate kiss.

Claire intended just to press her lips on mine, but I hold the back of her head and insert my tongue in her mouth.

「Nnbh!?」

I twirl my tongue with hers in a sticky mess.

Our breathing echoed throughout the room and our mix of saliva trickled down our chins and to our chest.

「Nn! Nfu......nnmu......chuuba......」

Claire rubs my manhood against her crack as she accepts the kiss, and I grope her exquisite breasts as I work my tongue furiously.

「「Mmu.」」

Celia and Laurie groan in discontent.

It is somewhat pleasing as a man to feel a woman's jealousy.

I end the kiss and separate from her mouth.

A bridge of sticky saliva glistens between us.

「It's big. May I?」

「Go ahead, I am ready.」

I relax my arms and allow my weight to do the rest.

My dick which is already clinging to the entrance of her hole easily slides in.

「Ah......aaahn......uuu! Uuuuuuuuー!!」

Claire's initial high-pitched moans quickly change to low-pitched growls.

「I-it sounds painful.」

「Her hole is being stretched. Aegir-sama's head is pretty big so her insides are probably being stretched further.」

She clearly seems to be suffering, but I can't stop now.

I push Claire's voluptuous thighs apart and plunge my dick deeper inside.

「It's bigger than before! It feels like I'm being torn apart! Aaaah!」

Claire pushes against my chest in apparent pain.

I stop when approximately half of my entire length is inside.

Aiming for the moment she breathes a sigh of relief, I thrust my hips forward.

「Higyii!」

With a zlorp, my dick invades Claire's deepest parts.

Her limbs reflexively flail around, but I embrace her and use my body to hold her still.

「That was so mean.」

「She'll be fine. If Aegir-sama was serious, he would have thrusted to her womb. If that happened, she would scream.」

I wait until Claire's cold sweat turns into sweat from excitement as sharp squeals mix with her labored panting and her nails dig into my back.

Eventually, the hand wrapped around my back begins pounding my body.

I slowly lift my hips, pulling out halfway, and then insert my dick to the back again.

「Higguh!」

I overlap Claire's hand with my hand, and pull out again before thrusting hard enough to move her entire body.

「Auu!」

Her much more delicate body slides on the sheets.

I grab the top of her shoulders and fix her in place as I pull out again until I'm at the entrance, then purposely shift my hips slightly before thrusting.

My dick penetrates at an awkward angle, scraping one side of her canal as it hits the end.

「Uugh!」

Claire lets out something close to a scream and throws her head backward.

When she arches her back and presents her breasts to me, I suck on them, causing her to hold my head and moan.

As she clutches my head, I rock my hips in a rhythmic manner and transition to typical intercourse.

Cloudy fluid trickles from Claire's vagina and a wet noise is made with each thrust, providing me with the proof of her genuine arousal.

Bumps and veins on my rock hard erection grind against her walls and my turtle head expands her entire pussy.

Once every few thrusts, the tip of my dick would kiss the opening of her womb and make a subtle pop.

Each time that happens, I groan and Claire digs her nails in my back and shrieks.

「It feels so good, Claire.」

「This feeling is......driving me crazy......aaaooh!」

Celia and Laurie observe our activities at close range.

「The Margrave's cock, isn't it bigger than before?」

Laurie mutters the question to Celia.

「Even though the incense may have caused it to swell more, according to my memories......it wasn't so lumpy.」

「Aegir-sama's penis grows daily. If I don't see it for a week, sometimes an additional bump appears or the entire thing increases in size.」

Having two girls analyze my gentials while I'm having sex is kind of exciting.

I think I might have sped up my thrusts a tiny bit without realizing.

「My hips, my body can't take it anymore! It's too big......this dick is practically shaped to kill a woman......it wasn't like this the last time......aah, a bump is rubbing my insides! Not the veins! It's perfectly hitting the spot where I'm the weakest!」

Claire screams and her pussy starts convulsing.

I pause my back-and-forth movements temporarily and push my dick firmly up against the end to fully enjoy her orgasm.

When her convulsions diminish in strength, I resume moving my hips.

She goes from gasping during climax to adhering to my body when I cease thrusting......and then the in-and-out continues.

「N-no more......please cum Aegir-sama! At this rate, I'll die! Release your white essence inside me. Finish me!」

「Haha, no need to hold back. Let yourself cum.」

I thrust to the back again and repeatedly flex my abdominal muscle.

In doing so, I emulate the throbbing of my dick during ejaculation.

Sensing those signs, her body instinctively tightens.

「It's moving! Even though it's pulsing, no semen is coming out! Your dick is just constantly twitching!」

「Fufufu, it's a sneak attack.」

By imitating the behavior or my lower half, I don't actually shoot anything and I don't lose any rigidity.

As a bonus, I can continuously do it as much as I want.

「You're so mean! You get a woman's body ready to accept and......aah, I can't hold it anymore!! 」

Her womb was forced to orgasm by the wiggling of my dick.

If she received my seed, I would have experienced an intense orgasm at that moment, but it was a trick so no hot semen exited my dick.

「Aaah, it's not ending! The small orgasms keep going!!」

As a result, Claire's orgasm is prolonged.

Those orgasms aren't intense enough to blow her mind, rather they are a chain of small orgasms that seem to last forever and gently sear the brain.

「I beg you, please cum...... your hot juice......your baby batter, please blast my womb with your thick jizz!!」

I softly bite on the earlobe of Claire, whose face has warped beyond recognition, and whisper directly into her ear.

「Alright, I'm cumming.」

Claire's entire body tenses up to the point that she seems frozen.

Simultaneously, some pre-cum shoots from the tip of my dick and splashes the entrance of her womb.

That was enough.

「Gggh, cumminnggggg!!」

Claire's body contorts as if she is doing a vulgar dance and her waist bucks countless times as she squirts out a stream of fluid, eventually collapsing on the bed with her eyes rolled to the back of her head.

「Hup.」

I slowly slide my rock hard cock out of Claire's hole.

An additional jet shoots from the unconscious Claire's vagina and hits the ceiling.

Her crotch is a flood and her face......I would feel sorry if anybody saw her expression.

I'll lay her on her side.

「Claire-sama and I are both confident in our sexual prowess......but it seems we are no match for you.」

Laurie comments as she gracefully strips her clothes.

「Hmmm, as always......」

「Fufu, young? Please rest assured. I am 20 years old, although I don't have much hair there.」

Right, having no pubic hair is what emphasizes her youth the most.

「Wait a second! You went with the flow and embraced Claire-san first so next has to be me――」

「Eei!」

Laurie pastes another promissory note on the approaching Celia's forehead.

Celia immediately stops moving.

Her reaction is similar to that of a demon whose movements are sealed by a paper talisman.

「Don't bully her too much. She's my precious Celia.」

「I won't. That's why we're exempting her from the 20-percent monthly interest normally attached to the debt. In exchange......」

Laurie whispers the request to me.

Well, if that's all it takes for her to be free from interest, I'll do it as much as she wants.

「Then, if you'll excuse me......ahem. Papa, wanna have sex with Laurie?」

「Papa!?」

Celia is brought back to life by the shock.

But it doesn't stop Laurie.

She sticks another 20-percent interest note on Celia to restrict her movements and rubs affectionately against me, calling me papa like a spoiled child.

Her sense of reason is questionable because of the incense too.

「Papa's is big so you can thrust it into Laurie's little hole. Papa can shove his black peepee in Laurie's pink hairless crotch.」

Laurie speaks like an actual toddler and smiles innocently as she strokes my dick.

「Funyii, Papa's is as hard as steel. I can't wrap my hand around the whole thing.」

While giving me an upward gaze, Laurie retrieves a pot from under the bed and rubs an oily substance on my dick for lubrication.

「Funyaa.」

She pretends to act clumsy and spills the rest on herself.

「Papa, wanna do naughty and slippery things with Laurie?」

Laurie topples me onto my back and climbs on top of me.

She squeezes my greasy dick between her thighs and rocks her body back and forth.

「Papa, does it feel good? Does Laurie's smooth crotch feel good?」

「Yeah, it's great Laurie. As expected of my daughter.」

Laurie shows me a pure smile and increases the speed of her hips.

As she rubs me, she gradually slides backward......in other words, she moves her hips toward the tip of my dick.

Her hairless slit starts at the root of my shaft, goes to the middle, and then makes its way to the tip as she presses the soft head against her entrance.

Laurie smiles innocently and continues rocking back and forth.

Naturally, my tip pushes against her slit, and borrowing the power of the oil, intrudes inside.

「Hiigii!」

Laurie screams as she returns to normal for an instant, but quickly grins at me.

「Papa's black peepee is inside now. It spread apart Laurie's lower lips and pushed its way inside. We're doing naughty things as parent and child.」

「Yeah, it's unbelievable. I've done it with my daughter.」

Despite her body leaking cold sweat, Laurie maintains her youthful girly tone.

「Papa can use his big hands to play with Laurie's small chest.」

She guides my hands to her modest mounds.

They are so small that it feels criminal for my rugged hands to fondle them.

「Papa can use his black rugged rod to pound Laurie's insides.」

Laurie moves up and down.

Her shiny childlike body slathered with oil dances.

「And when you can't hold it in anymore-」

Laurie pinches both of my nipples.

「You can spurt it all inside Laurie.」

My erection rises even higher in excitement.

Laurie notices and delivers the final blow by whispering in my ear.

「Wait, doing that is a bad idea. I've recently developed a strange fetish for――」

It was too late.

Laurie whispers in her sweetest possible voice.

「Papa can shoot his seed inside Laurie's womb and make a baby inside her small room.」

Laurie's body immediately lifts up.

No, that's incorrect. It was my hips that lifted.

「Uooooh!!」

「Eh?」

The surprised voice and the sound of my ejaculation happened at the same time.

The whisper in my ear triggered me to cum way too easily and I ended up doing exactly as Laurie provoked me to do - blasting her insides with my sperm.

I hold Laurie's waist with the power of a vise and shoot my semen deep inside her.

Adjusting myself into the missionary position, I proceed to pin Laurie down and pour more of my juices.

Her thin arms and legs flap in vain.

A glob of emen viscous enough for me to feel a slight resistance as it exits my urethra is pumped into the infantile body with every pulse of my dick.

My mind wants to release the squirming Laurie, but my body is suppressing her against my will.

The best I can do is to prop myself up with my arms and prevent my entire weight from crushing her.

Laurie's belly doesn't take long to swell and a yellow goop overflows from where we are connected.

「Ah......aau......」

Laurie has already lost the capacity to act and it's a matter of time before she also falls unconscious.

She musters up the last of her energy to look at me with an unsteady gaze.

「Papa, I love you.」

After uttering those words, Laurie faints.

I feel the sensation of something strange passing through my urethra.

A Little Later In the Evening.

「......」

Adolph silently applies pressure on me.

「That's Adolph for you.」

Feeling guilty that I exposed the existence of the dwarf gold mine which Adolph told me to keep secret, I came up with several accommodations to compensate.

First, I let him sit at the head of the table during dinner.

Next, I asked for the highest class gourmet cuisine to be served only to him.

Furthermore, he is the only one surrounded by performers playing music.

And lastly, I hired three prostitutes and snuck them under the table at his feet.

「I'm obviously going to realize something is up if you do this out of the blue.」

Adolph sighs and shakes his head.

Something fine is scattering loosely......no, let's not worry about that.

I'll also ignore Polte as she desperately tries to keep the prostitutes away.

「From what I hear, Claire-san won't be revealing anything. And although we will suffer a great penalty if the gold mine eventually becomes exposed, they will be sentenced to certain death.」

Claire betraying me never really crossed my mind.

「As they say, it takes a thief to catch a thief. It might be better to use her abilities to conduct trade without being discovered. In the first place, I never expected Hardlett-sama to keep it a secret forever.」

「You said a bit too much there.」

Polte is chasing after the prostitutes, trying to retrieve the underwear they stripped from her.

She's totally being toyed with.

「We'll also be shouldering Celia-san's debt right? I'd like to inquire about the amount.」

I chuckle confidently.

「That has been taken care of. I recovered the money using the same method.」

「You mean margin trading? Using that to try and recoup a loss seems pretty messy.」

Leah was the one who splendidly avenged Celia.

「First of all, I bet that the price of soybeans would rise again. But unfortunately, the price started to decline.」

「Right...」

I call over Leah who is watching with her chest held high.

「That's why she bought soybeans from the marketplace on my orders to be used as food for the army. As a result, the price rose.」

I high-five Leah.

「Later, I assumed that it was about time for the price to fall back down. But for some reason, it continued to rise.」

「......」

I bring the revived Celia close to me after removing the talisman from her forehead.

「So I released my stockpile of soybeans back into the market. The price halved, although only for a second!」

I raise a hand to high-five Celia, but she seems to be overly conscious of Adolph for some reason and doesn't reciprocate my enthusiasm.

「In conclusion, the loss was recovered. If you think about it, isn't this easy money? There's nothing to lose.」

I wonder if such a deal can be carried out every time.

Well, it's pretty much like gambling so thinking too much won't help.

Adolph inhales deeply.

「So you're the one responsible for the wild price swings!!? Obviously, you're losing money by intervening!」

Adolph's shout and Polte's scream after she stole back her underwear echoed.

Anyways, it's been peaceful lately.

And then I catch a glimpse of Lammy's body being reflected in the window.

「I'm sure the peace will continue for a few more days.」

I stretch and hug the three prostitutes fooling around with Polte.

「Since you've come all this way, how about a round with me?」

「「「Sure~」」」

Celia's debt is erased too, so we can live happily ever after.

Protagonist: Aegir Hardlett. 25 years old. Winter.

Status: Goldonia Kingdom Margrave. Great Feudal Lord of Eastern Area. Mountain Legend.

Friend of the Dwarves. Friend of the King of Aless. Dragon Slayer Hero.

Elf Mediator. Sex King of White City. Mad Demon God. Poison Resistance. Market Magician (phony)

Appears in the present story:

Celia (futures defeat), Head-helmina (futures big win), Leah (unfair win), Claire (lower back pain), Laurie (serious mode)

Adolph (market turmoil), Polte (no panties)

Territory Population

Total: 364 000

Rafen: 47 000, Lintbloom: 8 000

Richemott (former Libatis): 33 000 (+1000) Populace gathering, Zwei Elfie: 1500 (+400) Increase of scoundrels

Army

Personnel: Infantry: 1000, Cavalry: 500, Escort: 30

Armaments: Cannons: 30, Large Cannons: 15, Dwarven Cannons: 15, Field Artillery: 10 +1, Chariots: 30

Assets: -308 000 gold (gold ore medium +8 000), (market intervention -3 000), (futures profit +1 000)

Sexual Partners: 814

Children who have been born: 71 + 567

Current Location: Rafen