Chapter 2: Madness

...What.... happened to me?

I regained consciousness due to an intense cold that felt like it was tearing my flesh apart.

Ugh... it's so cold...

My eyes struggled to open. Had my eyelids frozen shut?

I barely managed to open my eyes, but it took a while before I could make out anything. My eyes hurt as if I was opening them for the first time in my life.

"What's this?"

It was only when my vision cleared that I realized the bizarre situation I was in.

I was stuck standing in a cramped piece of machinery that was extremely cold.

Furthermore, I was completely enclosed in a large glass tube.

It was as if I had become a test subject caught by a mad scientist...

In fact, my clothes were completely different from what I had been wearing before.

A plain white outfit with no pattern.

Leather straps were stitched right into the cuffs at my wrists and ankles.

Ahhh, are these straps restraining me? But their design looks almost like...

A straitjacket made to restrain dangerous patients in a psychiatric ward... is that it?

Ah, I see. So I've finally gone mad.

The last memory I could recall came to mind.

Suddenly, something was appearing on the monitor... Ah, that's what it was... I knew something like this would happen someday...

...But what is actually going on here?

This isn't a psychiatric ward. After all, which real-world hospital would confine patients in such huge cold glass tubes?

And why do I feel so strange?

The shift in my emotions was too drastic. Was I always like this? Instead of feeling worry and fear about my surroundings, I found myself leisurely observing them.

Outside the glass tube I'm trapped in...

The lighting is dim...

Strange machinery...

Messily exposed wires...

There were a few desks too...

Oh, look! To my left and right, there were more glass tubes lined up along the wall, and inside them...

There are people sleeping!

Ah, what is this!

Wait a minute.

Wait, wait, wait... This structure looks familiar...

Just as something was about to surface in my mind, a translucent message appeared in the empty air.

[You have opened your eyes inside a test tube. Your senses are tingling. Your body, long frozen, is gradually regaining vitality. 'Where am I?... Who am I?' You realize that you have no memory of your past and are deeply shocked. You also don't know where you are. But one thing you do remember clearly.

Your name is Kim Shin-hwa.

You lived in South Korea...]

What is this... a message? And what do you mean I don't remember anything? I do remember.

Push-soo-

Suddenly, a sound that resembled air escaping filled the area around me. Accompanied by a faint hum of motors, the test tube that had me confined started to open, and the straps binding my body automatically released. Ah, I was free at last!

[...You are a mage gazing into the abyss. No one knows what you must do or what end you will meet. Good luck.]

"What kind of bullshit is this!"

But the real bullshit was yet to come.

Soon, a new message appeared.

[System: Penalty trait 'Shattered Mind' activated. Since you currently have no mental illness, a random mental illness will manifest.]

Mental illness you say? mental illness? Are they talking about the mental illness from [Cthulhu World]?

The flower of [Cthulhu World], the symbol of [Cthulhu World], the core system of [Cthulhu World].

Characters who acquired knowledge that humans shouldn't have found their sanity and reason gradually crumbling...

[System: 'Mental illness- Mask Obsession' and 'Mental illness- Musophobia (fear of rats)' have been inflicted on your mind.]

...Leaving abnormal scars on the psyche.

That's mental illness, but... wait, what kind of mental illness has befallen me?

[A mage gazing into the abyss] possesses an indomitable spirit that never breaks down.

Because they are already mad... a mind once shattered cannot be shattered again.

They must always harbor a certain level of mental illness.

I am the mage gazing into the abyss, and I've become mad?

Having one or two forms of mental illness doesn't immediately cause problems.

Isn't there a saying that every modern person harbors some mental illness within them?

As long as nothing triggers my obsessions or fears... there should be no problem. Right, there shouldn't be. Should there?

So, I have a mask obsession. Mask obsession is...

Unconsciously,

I touched,

My face,

And so, there was nothing,

On my face.

So, there's nothing on my face?

The realization that nothing was covering my face...

[You realize there is nothing on your face. The fact that your face is bare, not covered by a mask, is extremely terrifying and sends chills down your spine. The madness latent within you manifests, warping your mind. Mental distortion is about to occur.]

"Hey, wait! Just wait a moment! Hold on!"

Madness, a form of mental disorder, would emerge, leading to behavior typical of someone truly crazy.

[System: Attempting to resist the distortion with your mental strength stat. Mental strength check...]

However, distortion doesn't necessarily have to manifest. I have a mental strength stat, and the higher this stat is, the greater the likelihood of resisting the distortion.

[...Failure.]

Ahh, damn it!

[System: 'Mental illness- Mask Obsession' triggers the 'Status Ailment- Mental Distortion']

The message kept displaying text as it pleased, but I couldn't understand its meaning.

More importantly, there was something else.

That terrible sensation on my face, that feeling... My face, my own face, was crawling with goosebumps. That awful sensation, as if something with hundreds of legs, a creature, was crawling beneath my face...

Something was crawling!

It felt like the skin on my face was going to rip. It stretched. It was being peeled off! Something was crawling beneath my face!

If I didn't cover it with something, if I didn't shield my face...

I mean my face, it seemed as if it was going to tear apart! Worms! Crawling! All over my face!

My vision was distorted.

I barely managed to grasp my face, which felt as though it was pouring down, with both hands as I walked out of the test tube.

My face was sliding off.

Worms crawled under my cheek, and a cicada was moving unpleasantly as if nudging my eyeball.

My vision, it was distorting.

Crawling out from under my eyelid.

The cicada on my left eye briefly crawled across my forehead and then... after fluttering its wings a few times, it took flight.

An unpleasant, stinging sensation under my cheeks...

It stings! Crawling!

It was tearing through my flesh!

My vision kept shaking.

Something was covering my eyes.

Worms? No, it was my hand.

On the ground, no, the sea, no, I mean, the slanted chair on the floor was mocking me.

Don't look at my face!

A terrible scream was heard.

Was that noise coming from my throat?

Not me, no, it's not me...

A bizarre noise emanated from my throat.

There was a large paper bag on the chair.

It was big enough to cover my head.

I need to grab it.

I need something to cover my face with.

I need a mask!

Ah, damn it. There's something inside the bag!

I must wrap it carefully to prevent it from bursting.

Just dispose of everything inside the bag!

And then...

Hurry...

I mean...

[System: The 'Status Ailment - Mental Distortion' has been removed due to you wearing the mask. Be aware that losing the mask could trigger the mental illness again.]

As soon as I put the paper bag—no, the mask—over my head, the mental distortion vanished.

"Huff, huff, huff..."

What I had put over my head was a large paper bag with no holes for eyes.

Although it completely blocked my vision, it felt surprisingly comfortable, perhaps because it helped ease the lingering madness and pain caused by the mental distortion.

"Huff, huff, huff..."

Now, the only sound I could hear was my breathing.

There was no sound of insect wings. There were never any insects in this place to begin with.

"Haah..."

I was going crazy. Or had I already gone crazy? Regardless, nothing would change if I just stayed like this. First, I needed to make sure I could see.

I tried to make eye holes in the mask, but it wasn't working. Was it because I had used up too much strength during the distortion?

My hands were shaking unusually, and I couldn't muster any strength in my arms and legs. Ugh, if I accidentally tore the mask completely, that would be the end of me!

Carefully, I inserted my hand inside the mask and slowly made the holes. That's right, good job, Kim Shin-hwa!

It was only after I could see that I realized how bizarre I looked.

I was wearing a paper bag over my head, and my clothes were a pure white straitjacket. It was a relief that I had shoes on, even if they were white rubber slippers.... Anyway, I couldn't take off the mask even if I wanted to.

If there is no mask, will things like this continue to happen?

It wasn't a mask, but a paper bag. However, as long as I perceived it as a mask and wore it, I wouldn't experience that mental distortion.

But my mental illness wasn't just limited to an obsession with masks. There was another thing...

[List of mental illnesses: 'Mental illness- Mask Obsession', 'Mental illness - Musophobia']

"......Thank you for letting me know."

How kind of them.

Damn it, damn it!

What in the world is happening!

Madness and the distortion that comes from it were horrific experiences.

To the player outside the game, madness was just a 'state', but now I could understand how terrible it was for the character experiencing it.

As my mind began to stabilize, my body started to scream in discomfort.

So, so cold... Incredibly so...

While it wasn't as cold as when I first stepped out of the test tube due to the distortion, the temperature of this space itself was extremely low.

I wrapped my arms around myself and shivered for a moment. Considering how much I had sweated during the recent distortion, my straitjacket was damp. Ugh... the sweat is going to freeze.

What now? Is there a heater somewhere... or at least a lighter?

Wait a minute, think...

After going through panic, anger, and irritation, a natural sense of self-awareness dawned on me.

Madness was not the only thing that the [Mage Gazing into the Abyss] possessed.

That's right, I am... a mage.

If I truly have become a "Mage Gazing into the Abyss", it's only fair that I have magical abilities, not just madness, right?

In the world of [Cthulhu World], a mage was an amazing being.

They can twist cause and effect and alter the laws of the world to create the reality they desire.

Moreover, I was not just any mage. I was a genius mage with Mythical talent.

I have become a being capable of achieving anything I desire.

I need warmth now... so, fire. How do I use magic?

"Fire! Bring forth fire! Come out, fire! [Ignition]!"

My hope soon transformed into will, and the magical power flowed along a defined path.

It was as natural and simple as breathing or moving a finger.

Perhaps even more familiar than moving my eyelids or tongue.

The magic emanating from my body reshaped reality to fulfill my wishes.

Flames ignited on the piles of paper scattered on the floor (likely the papers that had been inside my 'mask').

The red color, the smoke, and the ample warmth it provided were just as I desired.

"Now, it feels like I can survive."

As I gazed absent-mindedly at the fire, my eyes naturally began to dismantle and analyze the components and flow of magical power that made up the fire.

This flow was a concoction of artificial magic that I created.

At the same time, a list of spells capable of altering, enhancing, and controlling this flow of magical power popped up in my mind.

And beyond that list, there were many more spells.

I could perform all of them.

"Is this for real...?"

I was truly a mage.

I felt a trembling sense of omnipotence and a slight sense of self-loathing at the same time.

In the end, a self-deprecating laugh escaped my throat due to a sense of desperation.

"Hahaha, I must be going mad... Have I really entered the world of the game? And of all games, this terrible one?"

I knew the name of this place.

[K-3675 Secret Research Facility].

This was the starting point in the game of [Cthulhu World].