Chapter 149: Festival Date (4)
On a dark evening, as the festival drew to a close, the Academy still glowed brightly with lights.
Filled with a determination not to end the day just yet, an enormous bonfire illuminated the dark sky.
"Sigh."
"..."
And there was Erica standing beside me. The sigh that escaped her lips was quite long.
"Are you worried? Perhaps there might be some strange rumors about you that might be going around because of me."
Due to her experience of directly refuting the rumors and gossip that surrounded me in the past, Erica reacted sensitively to rumors.
Since I also felt that I had been getting complacent, I had nothing to say in defense of myself in this situation.
"In the morning, you had a secret meeting with Princess Eleanor, then an outdoor date with a maid wearing quite a revealing outfit in the afternoon, followed by another date with a female student."
"...It was not a date."
Although I tried to explain, Erica turned a deaf ear to my words and kept speaking.
"And later, you were taken to the lab by Aria, right?"
Ultimately, there was nothing wrong with what was said. Because I couldn't say anything in response to that statement, I simply turned my gaze towards the bonfire, where the Dark Spiritualist was spinning around, looking excited.
Even the last time, I had noticed that she seemed to like big fires like those.
"I did not do anything strange."
When I continued to remain silent, it felt like Erica's fiery gaze was stabbing into my side, so I eventually answered her. She let out a deep sigh upon hearing my response.
"Of course, you did not. I don't think you acted out of ulterior motives. You probably did something like counseling."
Erica's guess was unexpectedly accurate. When it involved personal feelings that couldn't be shared with others, it could indeed be seen as counseling.
"However, the problem is, people around us don't think that way. Despite that, rumors about you are already circulating, especially among the guests from outside"
"Who told you this?"
"..."
Erica's silence affirmed my words. No matter who she was, she wouldn't have been able to catch wind of the rumors this quickly.
Since Erica was my fiancée, that person must have told her out of concern.
'Your fiancée is spending time with other women,' was probably what they said.
Somehow, being scrutinized like this by those around us, made it feel like we were the protagonists of a morning drama1.
If things continued like this, not only would there be misunderstandings, but Erica's image would also suffer.
"Well, I don't really care what other people think of me. However, you're different. You're the first recognized Dark Mage in the kingdom, the Soul Whisperer affiliated to the Royal Family."
I could hear genuine concern only for me from Erica's voice.
"Be careful, as great as your position is. There will be many who are ."
Her response showed that she didn't care what others thought about her; upon hearing that, I once again sensed the changes in her.
She was no longer a woman that a ruffian like Gideon Zeronia could sway. The fragile Erica, whose future had been forcibly taken away by her household's status, had now disappeared.
Her attitude of not being intimidated by the gazes of others, because she was confident in herself and her firmly held beliefs, perfectly suited her to be called a lady.
But strangely, I couldn't help but wonder why I didn't want to leave her alone.
"You seem to have misunderstood me."
"Huh?"
Erica tilted her head in confusion at my sudden words. While still staring at the blazing bonfire, I continued speaking.
"If my image as the Soul Whisperer is important, then naturally, as my fiancée, you should not get involved in such malicious gossip either."
"Hmm, that's true."
"It seems like there is a need to talk about our relationship."
I slowly stretched out my hand to Erica.
"If you do not mind, how about we spend some time together?"
"..."
Erica stared blankly at my hand before chuckling, finally taking it cautiously.
"Do you usually flirt with women in Norseweden like this?"
"I do not really want to talk about those times."
"Alright, I never imagined that my fiancé would be such a playboy either. They really investigated your past to make me change my mind and force me to marry into the Zeronia family, you know?"
"Indeed, that could be useful ammunition for the family meeting this time."
Knowing that they had researched my background would give me more of an advantage when we finally visit the Bright household.
"Yes, that's why I'm telling you."
Then, Erica smiled softly as if it were expected of her. Her fingers naturally and gently intertwined with mine.
Then, with a red face, she lowered her head deeply. When I kept staring at her after her bold action, she covered her mouth with her other hand and glanced at me sideways.
"Don't look."
"The heat feels intense."
Blushing with embarrassment, Erica spoke bluntly. Following her request, I slightly turned my head.
As I walked slowly towards the bonfire, her steps naturally followed mine.
"Oh."
"Oh, it's Professor Erica and Professor Deus."
"Wow, they make a good-looking couple."
"They suit each other well."
Voices came from around us. It was a perfect performance to quell rumors about our relationship.
"Let us stay like this for a moment."
At my words, Erica nodded without saying much, subtly moving closer to place her arm against mine.
Though her cheeks were still flushed, she seemed to have calmed down now. She looked at the bonfire before speaking again.
"Just a few months ago, I never thought we'd have a moment like this."
"...Me neither."
"Uh, well, you know..."
Erica's lips twitched as she looked hesitant. There was a look on her face that seemed as if she wanted to say something but wasn't sure if it was appropriate.
To provide encouragement, I gave her a reassuring squeeze on her hand. Erica finally met my gaze and spoke her mind.
"When you first came to the academy, didn't we spend about a month and a half together?"
During that three-month period, we spent half of the time together.
After which, our relationship soured; we hardly spoke and eventually, I was dismissed from my professorship at the end of the third month.
"Back then, did you ever feel a sort of flutter when you were around me?"
"..."
It was an unexpected question that it caused my brows to furrow slightly. Seeing this, Erica continued nervously.
"N-no! I mean, it was my first time seeing a guy! And I've never even been on a date..."
"Did we ever go on a date?"
"...Didn't we drink coffee on the rooftop at night?"
Erica swung the hand she clasped with mine to hit my thigh.
Well, we did spend a lot of time alone together.
"Although you said you didn't like me, I still... wondered if I was the only one who managed to make you feel a flutter when I was around."
"Hmm."
Honestly, I couldn't confidently say that I had ever felt something like that. At that time, I didn't really understand what love was, and besides, I didn't remember those few months that well.
However...
"During those three months, I was quite busy comforting the Angel and the residents of Setima."
"That's right."
Thanks to that, I was even accused of being a devil worshiper.
Anyway...
"But even in the midst of all that, I always made time for you."
"..."
"I am not sure if I ever felt a flutter in me around you. However, I did enjoy it."
When I confessed my honest feelings, Erica's gaze didn't waver from me.
Then, she cautiously dropped another question.
"How about now?"
"..."
"I'm feeling extremely nervous right now."
Her usual cool-headed icy professor expression had melted away in the warmth of the bonfire, it was replaced by a face filled with earnestness that was only visible to me.
"Your hands are bigger than I thought. You look so thin and need to eat more. You smell sweeter than I expected. What if you can also hear my heart beating so fast right now?"
"..."
"These various emotions and thoughts are making my head feel so complicated."
Erica exhaled deeply before speaking again.
"Deus, how about you? Despite our relationship being fake, are you... enjoying this time with me, with your fiancée?"
Her question gave me a chance to ask myself.
Am I... enjoying this?
"Yes."
It was enjoyable.
"It is pleasant."
Spending time with a woman named Erica Bright wasn't bad at all.
Since we were both adults, there was no pressure, and we didn't force anything on each other.
While we didn't care about the opinions of others, our time together was quite special.
"I'm glad to hear that."
Erica slowly lowered her head and a faint sigh of relief escaped along with her voice.
Thud.
She released her hand, which was holding onto mine.
The warmth and weight I felt in my left hand disappeared, leaving only a hollow feeling behind.
Though the night breeze naturally seeped in to replace it, the empty space remained unfilled.
Erica took out a piece of paper from her coat pocket.
It was a familiar item— a document tightly bound with a red thread.
It was the annulment letter.
"Here."
Erica slowly unfolded the annulment letter she had handed me. Next to my signature was hers, which wasn't there initially.
"..."
I didn't feel the need to say anything. I calmly looked at her, waiting for her to explain her intention.
"You said I should bring this to you once I returned to being the radiant and beautiful Erica Bright."
"Yes, I did."
"How about now?"
She stood tall with confidence. Despite a slight tear glistening in the corner of her eye, her posture remained unwavering.
Seeing that, I answered.
"You are radiant and beautiful now."
Indeed, she was.
I had no choice but to answer honestly.
Erica spoke with a smile.
"Do you know that you've changed so much?"
I didn't deny it.
If I objectively looked back at myself, there were indeed many differences between who I was when I first came to the academy and who I am now.
"To you, who could only faintly feel emotions and was more indifferent and blunt than other people..."
"..."
"This is the only apology I, Erica Bright, can offer. As the woman who betrayed you, I hope I can be of some help to you, even if it's just a little."
When she slowly lowered the annulment letter, her tearful face came into view.
Despite appearing distressed, she continued to speak.
"Just like when you gave this letter to me for my sake, this time I'll give it to you for yours."
When I handed her this annulment letter, the words I said to her were...
- _Not even for a moment... I have never felt the emotion called love for you. _
"Because I have never stopped loving you, not even for a moment."
This time, instead.
- However, you are worth loving. No, you are a woman deserving of love.
"That is how much you are worth loving, and deserve to be loved."
- That is why I spent time with you and hoped to see you smile, I wished to love you.
"Therefore, I'll give you time—time for you to meet someone who can make you smile, someone who you can truly love."
She returned those words to me.
With tears streaming down her face, Erica took a deep breath and continued.
"Have confidence in yourself because you are an incredibly amazing man."
"..."
"That annulment letter, when you find a woman you truly love..."
Erica slowly closed her eyes.
"Use it then."
She seemed to find it agonizing to just look at me.
"When you find someone who can awaken your emotions..."
"..."
"Bring it to me, and then we will finalize our separation."
"Erica."
Just like when Erica pushed Gideon away by using our engagement, she told me to use her as a shield to prevent any women I might not love from forcing themselves on me.
It would be a painful stage for her.
She would have to wait tirelessly for me to make my decision, sacrificing her most brilliant years,and in the end, nothing would remain.
As long as we maintained our engagement, Erica couldn't meet anyone else.
No one else could love her.
"Those are the words I want to say to you, who has been my benefactor until now."
Flit.
The annulment letter fell from her grasp and to the ground. Once again, Erica held onto my hand and as if trying to hide it, she buried her tear-streaked face in my chest.
Unaware of the situation, the people around us either protested, saying that we shouldn't rub salt in their wounds or expressed envy, saying that our supposedly fiery display of affection was too much for their eyes.
However, we ignored them and simply focused on each other.
"But as your fiancée, if I were to voice my selfishness..."
That one phrase.
After uttering those words...
"Please, don't leave."
Erica continued to sob endlessly in my arms. She just cried, trembling with the fear of separation.
To prevent anyone else from seeing that, I gently embraced her.